Statusuri 2011: Statusuri amuzante pentru status

An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

The four most important words in any marriage…I ll do the dishes.

Men don t care what s on TV. They only care what else is on TV.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

When you re right, no one remembers. When you re wrong, no one forgets.

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

The trouble with being punctual is that nobody s there to appreciate it.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

A kiss is something you cannot give without taking and cannot take without giving.

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

They say hard work never killed anyone, but why take the chance.

I m on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.

I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.

If at first you don t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Never try to drown your troubles… Especially if he can swim.

Many people lose their tempers merely from seeing you keep yours.

Smile, it makes people wonder what you re thinking.

Words are potent weapons for all causes, good or bad.

A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours.